What do you want?

Why is this question so hard to answer? Every time I ask it in my role as a coach, people search their brains, bunch their mouths, and say, “Ummm, well, I think…”. You’d think that “what I want” would be the guiding thought in our heads every single day, but we are often so focused on the moment, so preoccupied with what’s right in front of us, sorting out the stuff we need to do today, that we overlook where we are heading.

If you’ve realised it’s time to get serious about your goals, then maybe these statistics will provide the motivation you need:

• Individuals with goals are 10 times more likely to succeed.
• Those who set actionable tasks and shared their progress with a supportive friend reached their goals 40% faster than those who only wrote down their goals without creating action plans.
• Only 16% of lower-level employees have a clear understanding of their company’s priorities and goals.
• 77% of people maintain their New Year’s resolutions for at least one week, but only 19% stick to them for up to two years.
• Studies show that 92% of people do not achieve their goals, while the 8% who do follow a similar pattern in accomplishing them.

Start defining your goals and creating a solid plan to achieve them!

 In my Career & Goal Planner, I have created a Life Goals roadmap because achieving these goals spurs us on, gets us through the tough bits, helps us with decision-making when we reach crossroads of opportunity, and identifies training needs we may have.

This Life Goals roadmap includes all sorts of things. The first part of identifying the goals that make your heart beat fast is to simply start throwing ideas down on a page until you stop.

The real trick is what happens next. Pick one of your goals and start asking yourself why. Why is it important to you? What does it look like? What does it make you feel? Deeply examine what it is about that goal that inspires you and makes you feel happy or positive. What are the constituent parts of that goal? Is it a personal achievement? Is it because of other people’s perception and understanding of who you are and what you’re capable of achieving? Does it elevate you? Or does it show how much you care, form a bond with someone you want in your life, and make you feel good about yourself?

If you are a visual person, draw a mind map and keep adding circles to circles. If you’re a list person, just keep listing. If you’re a talker, just keep talking – to yourself, to your trusted friend, or coach. If you’re a journaler, then write to your heart’s content.

Pick out another item on your list that jumps out at you, and do the same thing.

Do this until you want or need to stop. Don’t feel you have to go through every item on your list – but do pause to see which ones you picked to examine first. These are subconsciously your priorities at the moment, or the ones that excite you the most.

Often we define a goal by a tangible example of what we see, but this might not really be the real motivator. It’s just how it’s manifesting at that time. For example, let’s say you see a colleague presenting and they are seriously impressive. You think, “I want to be a great strategist like that person,” so you set your sights on becoming a strategist.

BUT… maybe what was inspiring you was something else. Maybe you want to be a great public speaker, and not necessarily a strategist. Maybe there is another subject matter you want to become an expert in and share with the world.

Maybe you loved the way they organized their thoughts, the clarity or humor of expression, how they expressed their meaning, the power of words. Your admiration for their skill may be tapping into the writer, performer, or change-maker within you.

The point is, don’t get caught up on the first manifestation of a goal. Sometimes it hides something deeper.

Really working out “what I want” takes time. If you’ve not invested much time into exploring this for the last 30 or 40 years, giving yourself a year to work it out isn’t going to break anything now.

So give yourself permission to go on the journey. Live your life, listening out each day for the things that you see, read, or experience that connect to one of your ideas, or create a new idea.

Go exploring for new ideas and experiences – read widely, listen to podcasts, go to events, talk to colleagues you’ve never spoken to before, ask a senior person out to lunch or drinks, contact a guru you admire, take on an extra task at work that’s in a field you want to learn about, ask for a job swap for a period of time, get out of your comfort zone and do something challenging or scary.

Collect more ‘Brownie/Scout’ badges by developing some additional, transferable skills – get good at networking, presenting, writing, facilitating, mindmapping, brainstorming etc. Collect a bunch of certificates. Add them to your CV and LinkedIn profile.

Set out to build a social media following on a topic you enjoy. Get to know what it takes to build an audience so when you have something you really want to share to the world, you’re not held back by not knowing how it all works.

Speaking out also starts defining the edges of who you are, so people know what they would come to you for, how they could involve you in a project or idea they have.

It’s amazing the pathways, choices, opportunities and conversations that open up around you when you embark on the journey of finding out what you want. What you really really want.